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David DeAngelo - Pioneer of the Cocky & Funny Method
Who is David DeAngelo?
David DeAngelo is the pseudonym of Eben Pagan, one of the most influential pick-up artists and dating coaches of the early 2000s. He developed the famous Cocky & Funny method and revolutionized the commercial side of the pick-up industry with his product Double Your Dating. Unlike other PUAs like Mystery or Neil Strauss, DeAngelo focused heavily on the psychological foundations of attraction and systematically marketed his knowledge through digital products.
Early Career and Background
Eben Pagan did not start his career as a pick-up artist, but as an entrepreneur and marketing expert. His technical and business training helped him elevate the pick-up community to a new commercial level:
- 1990s: Psychology studies and intensive self-study in the field of attraction
- Early 2000s: Founding "Double Your Dating" as an online business
- 2001-2002: First e-books and newsletters on dating
- 2003-2005: Building a multi-million dollar business
- 2006+: Expansion into other areas such as business coaching and personal development
The Cocky & Funny Method
The Cocky & Funny (arrogant and witty) method is David DeAngelo's most famous contribution to the pick-up community. It is based on the idea that men become more attractive to women through a combination of self-confidence (Cocky) and humor (Funny).
Core Principles of Cocky & Funny
How Cocky & Funny Works
The method uses psychological triggers to create attraction:
- Breaking the Nice Guy Pattern - Men stand out from overly nice competitors
- Creating Challenge - Women feel challenged by the playful arrogance
- Humor as Shield - The witty component prevents being perceived as truly arrogant
- Signaling Alpha Status - Self-confidence is interpreted as a sign of high social value
- Emotional Rollercoaster - Alternating between teasing and charm creates emotional tension
Caution: The method can quickly backfire if the balance between Cocky and Funny is not right. Too much arrogance without humor is repulsive, too much humor without self-confidence seems desperate.
Double Your Dating - The Commercial Empire
David DeAngelo was one of the first to professionally commercialize the pick-up scene. His Double Your Dating program became a million-dollar bestseller:
Product Range
- E-Books: "Double Your Dating" as the main product with over 100 pages of content
- Newsletters: Weekly dating tips via email (free, lead generation)
- Audio Programs: "Interviews with Dating Gurus" series with well-known PUAs
- Video Courses: Multi-part programs on specific topics
- Live Seminars: Multi-day bootcamps and workshops
- Mastermind Groups: High-priced coaching programs
Marketing Innovation
DeAngelo revolutionized marketing in the pick-up industry:
- Email Marketing: Building a list with over 1 million subscribers
- Affiliate Program: Other PUAs earned through referrals
- Upselling Funnel: From free newsletter to $3,000 seminar
- Social Proof: Testimonials and success stories as sales arguments
- Scarcity Tactics: Limited offers and artificial scarcity
DeAngelo's greatest marketing innovation was the free newsletter. He offered real value and built trust before selling more expensive products - a model that is now standard in online marketing.
Core Concepts and Teachings
In addition to Cocky & Funny, David DeAngelo developed other influential concepts:
1. Attraction Is Not a Choice
One of his central theses: Attraction is not a conscious decision. Women cannot control who they are attracted to. This insight frees men from the idea that they must be perfect.
2. Being the Prize
DeAngelo taught that men should see themselves as the prize, not the woman. This mindset shift changes the entire dynamics of the interaction and strengthens the Inner Game.
3. Sexual Communication
The focus on sexual communication - building sexual tension through body language, tone of voice and subtle innuendos without being explicit.
4. Value and Attraction
DeAngelo's model distinguishes between different value types:
- Survival Value - Financial security, status
- Reproductive Value - Genetic fitness, health
- Emotional Value - Humor, adventure, unpredictability
Influence on the Community
David DeAngelo had enormous influence on the development of the pick-up community:
Direct Contributions
- Professionalization: First systematic marketing of dating knowledge
- Accessibility: Reached a mass audience through affordable e-books
- Interview Series: Brought together various PUA philosophies
- Business Model: Inspired others to commercialize their knowledge
- Mainstream Acceptance: Helped make pick-up socially acceptable
Critical View
Not all aspects of DeAngelo's work are viewed positively:
Positive Aspects:
- Focus on self-improvement and psychological understanding
- Emphasis on authenticity within the Cocky & Funny method
- Comprehensive resources for beginners
- Less manipulative approaches than other PUAs
Critical Aspects:
- Strong commercialization of the community
- High-priced products with sometimes repetitive content
- Simplification of complex psychological concepts
- Promotion of stereotypical gender roles
Comparison with Other PUA Greats
Later Development and Eben Pagan
In the late 2000s, Eben Pagan increasingly distanced himself from the pick-up identity:
Transformation to Business Guru
- 2008+: Focus on general business coaching
- Wake Up Productive: Productivity program
- Altitude Summit: Business conferences and mastermind groups
- Virtual CEO: Online business training
- Authorship: Book on effective writing and publishing
Personal Life
- 2012: Marriage to Annie Lalla (yoga teacher and entrepreneur)
- Family: Focus on long-term relationship instead of pick-up
- Public Persona: Eben Pagan instead of David DeAngelo
- New Philosophy: Holistic life instead of pure dating focus
Practical Checklist: Implementing Cocky & Funny
Common Mistakes with Cocky & Funny
Many men fail at implementing Cocky & Funny because they make these typical mistakes:
- Too much Cocky, too little Funny - Simply seems arrogant and unlikeable
- Constant Teasing - Becomes tiring and can hurt
- Wrong Target Audience - Can backfire with very self-confident women
- Missing Humor - Dry arrogance without smile or wink
- Started Too Late - After a long Nice Guy phase, the switch seems fake
- Stopped Too Early - Becoming too serious and romantic too quickly
- Lacking Authenticity - If it doesn't fit your personality, it seems forced
- No Escalation - Only Cocky & Funny without physical escalation leads to the friend zone
Legacy and Lasting Influence
David DeAngelo's influence on the pick-up and dating coaching industry is still felt today:
Direct Successors
Many modern dating coaches have learned from or adapted DeAngelo's methods:
- Christian Hudson (The Social Man)
- Bobby Rio (Magnetic Messaging)
- Carlos Xuma (Alpha Masculinity)
- Various RSD Coaches integrated Cocky & Funny into their systems
Concepts in Mainstream
Some of his ideas have become dating mainstream today:
- "Don't be too available" - The idea of not appearing needy
- "Be confident" - Self-confidence as the key to attraction
- "Make her laugh" - Humor as an attraction factor
- "Be the prize" - Self-worth philosophy